Thursday, January 24, 2008

CLOVERVOMIT



I never walked out of a movie before, until now. Correction, I ran out of theater that was showing a free screening of "Who's Harry Crumb" at a FREE preview screening at The Beekman Theater on 66th and 2nd Avenue when I was living in NYC back in the late '80's..... Until now.

I saw CLOVERFIELD opening night and left about 3/4 into it because I got vertigo. The movie's gimmick a la "Blair Witch Project" is that it's a hand held first person perspective; so there's a swish pan, or shaky run every 2 seconds; So the flick made me sick, and the part where I decided to leave was when they needed to climb 39 floors to rescue this dude's girlfriend.

I knew I wasn't going to make it.... and I felt like a big pussy leaving. But as soon as I exited the theater there were 4 other people there, 2 of which were teenagers who sat in the front row. (ugh)

We exchanged horror stories and within minutes of talking one of them turned green, which passed itself over to me as well, and we both dashed over to the nearest mens room where I got to see how my dinner sandwich looked half digested.

When I finished I could still hear the kid in the stall yakking up his guts...."Bleeechhhhhh...." SPLASH...."ueeeuughhhrarrah...." SPLASH... (repeat)

Unfortunately the movie's not half bad, in regards to a simple B-Movie plot. I just can't watch it that big.

So JJ Abrams you now owe me $8.00 for "Armageddon" and now $12.00 for "Cloverfield"...and LOST is waaay overrated.

Gimme "LAND OF THE LOST" any day of the week.