FROM THE GRINDHOUSE- "THANKSGIVING!"

Sure I'm bootlegging copyrighted material. But that's how I got into most of these movies to begin with.

Chinese Pulp Fiction....

The Lyric Theater in 42nd Street Lives On...

The sprit of my youth lives on with a twin kill billing of PLANET TERROR and DEATH PROOF. This is the film I've been waiting for.
Citizen Kane, The Godfather Series and even Early Speilberg can kiss my ass.

GRINDHOUSE creates the atmosphere and spirit of the crummy 42nd Street theaters that I saw most of the AIP, Roger Corman, and later Golan Globus cannon of films. From "ALLIGATOR" to "MOTEL HELL" to "THE EVIL THAT MEN DO"; for better or worse my father had the good sense to have a multiplex babysit me and my brother every now and then when we were younger.



Conversely, my mother generally took me to more standard fare like "Star Wars", Woody Allen films and strangely enough, "ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK" and Chuck Norris in an "EYE FOR AN EYE". So I learned early on what the difference between safe summer blockbuster audiences and ones that can kill you if you laugh at the wrong joke.

The latter always fascinated me, partly because the Black guys in the audience were always talking to the screen. Now if I could only get a few Black dudes to watch "Schindler's List", "The Piano" or "The English Fucking Patient" with me to cackle in the back of the theater just to mess with that audience of unholy pretension.

The Lyric theater is on 42nd street in NYC. I saw a ton of movies there, the last being "SURVIVING THE GAME" with ICE-T. Sure enough as soon as the film started a Black family of 5 or six sat a few rows ahead of me and my buddy Chris. The adult was a Grandmother and the kids seemed to range in age from 10 - 17. Everytime someone got blasted into bits, these kids would laugh like DeNiro in CAPE FEAR; add to this the CONSTRUCTION going on while the movie was playing INSIDE the theater... ....funny stuff.



Well Keegs and Shelley, went with me to this and from frame one I was floored. "PLANET TERROR" - Rodriguez's picture harkens back to the Italian Zombie gore splatter fests (thank you!) where not one ounce of Karo Syrup is wasted. Lucio Fulci (director of ZOMBIE) and Dario Argento are somewhere smiling, as is John Carpenter, who's scores are paid homage to here.
Did I mention the gore? Every character is expendible. When their time's up, it's spectacular. I haven't seen such splatacular head wounds since "MANIAC" and "SCANNERS".

Even goremaster / Special EFX maesteo TOM SAVINI (who's horror make up book BIZZARRO I bought as a kid) is in it for fun. Add to this scratches and audio pops in the film and you genuinely feel like the film's about to snap in the projection booth.
Rose McGowan remided me of Sybill Danning's badass nature with her machine gun leg and kill 'em all attitude. Look for MsDanning in one of the phony trailers by the way. I'm glad to see that they threw her a part in all this.

In "DEATH PROOF" it's nice to see Kurt Russell be a badass again. After shit like "Dreamer", "Poseidon" (which I loooved by the way) it's nice to see MacReady throwing the dynamite back at the audience and screaming "Fuck you too!"

As Keegan mentioned on her blog, Tarantino gets way involved with dialogue with the women in this one. It reminded me of Reservoir Dog's opening in the diner, except with chicks rambling on about girlie shit. I guess that was the set up, because it goes 250 MPH after that. I don't want to give anything away, but not since "RONIN" has there been a car chase that actually had me on the edge of my seat. Also thank you Quentin for mentioning "Vanishing Point!", although my favorite car chase flick is "THE DRIVER"

Kudos to Quentin's DP debut too.

A lot recently's been said that Tarantino's hasn't been making films up to his expections since "PULP FICTION" but not too many directors have complete autonomy to make their own movies with their own signature style. What other director in the last 15 years actually created an adjective to describe their films? I was lukewarm at first to JACKIE BROWN (even being a fan of Pam Grier and the Blacksploitation genre) but after watching it again recently, it really addresses great themes of aging, love, and honor. The same for "KILL BILL" which I think is one of the important films of this decade...also one of the bloodiest...

Did I mention that Citizen Kane can kiss my ass?



and now PHANTASM:





PS - look for "GREAT WHITE" cereal, as an homage to the Enzo G. Castillari fantastic Jaws rip off "GREAT WHITE" which I saw at an advaced screening back in 1982...I put the trailer up on YOUTUBE...

Just ACCEPT your BALLS to the WALL

Take power metal. Add some boys from Germany. Make the lead singer a psuedo-midget named UDO....and get your BALLS to the WALL!

Be sure to stay 'till the end....

PS- KORN and INCUBUS both suck.

APRIL FOOLS

How about a little Louis CK for yuks.....

DIE HARD The BALLAD of JOHN McCLANE

Too bad DIE HARD IV's gonna suck.

HAPPY ST.PATTY's DAY ya' Drunk Micks!

The classic Leprechaun stuck in the tree in Alabama St. Patty day's story.

David Lee Roth is the MAN

This Monday Van Halen gets elected into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Let me tell you I hope a these guys BEAT the SHIT out of one another. The band isn't even going to play together on stage, as Scott Weiland and Slash will be playing their stuff on stage. What a bunch of tools.

This is the band that keeps breaking up and making up. They just cancelled a 40 city tour with David Lee Roth, as the Van Halen brothers and now Wolfgang ( Eddie's son, who replaced Michael Anthony on bass) can't get along with Roth. I was skeptical in the beginning when I heard of an attempt of a tour, because it'd be too good to be true. Plus, I'm real particular when bands reunite because it still isn't the original lineup. Which explains why I won't shell out the $$ for The EAGLES as Don Felder was kicked out; and yes, Nickleback and Coldplay can kiss my ass. While I'm on it, Good Charlotte sucks Gary Cherone's hairy brown taint.

I grew up on the early Van Halen David Lee Roth stuff, and saw them live at MSG in 1983. It was the one of the greatest live ROCK shows I ever saw. Seeing Paul McCartney was amazing too but he didn't hump a giant inflatable microphone and spray some female hardbodies in the front row with JD. Iron Maiden's POWERSLAVE tour with the Egyptian Backdrop comes a close second.

David Lee Roth is the greatest frontman in the history of Rock. As for the Van Hagar stuff, I'll give them 5150, but the rest of those albums were just mediocre. Sammy Hagar as talented as he is can't hold Roth's jock, and as for Cherone, Joe Lampone's the only hardcore goofball to actually buy Van Halen III, and he wanted so badly to like that album.

Anyway here's a sampling of the good old days...

Scarface the Video Game

"All I have in this word is my word and my balls...and I don't break them for nobody..." - Tony Montana

This is a pretty cool preview, since the ones in the movies altogether suck, ironically the video game world seem to know how to make them. Nice use of Motley Crue as well.

I'm saving up my allowance to get this game to feed my cravings for 1980's video crime games until GTA Vice City II finally comes out on the PS2. Since I'll most probably never get this filthy rich, and become a sociopath, it's cool to live vicariously through these games. Plus I admit to randomly carjacking and killin' people in them as a stress release especially after a long commute. The best is stealing an 18 wheeler and going on a rampage on everything on the streets, especially the cops for some reason.

First, The Warriors. Then The Godfather. Now if they only could come out with a TAXI DRIVER, and or a Escape From NY video game.

Baba Booey's Love Tape

Happy Valentine's day folks, and as a man who wooed and failed with many of the ladies I know that even I'm not that stupid to videotape my lovey talk and send it to a chick to get her back. Think of this as a cautionary tale.





In the 19th century if you waited outside a woman's home and read love sonnets and poems you're called romantic. Now it's called Stalking.

PS - O.J. killed Anna Nicole Smith.

THE ACE OF SPADES

With Van Halen getting their due into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame this March, hopefully the Jann Werner (Editor of Rolling Stone) and the Hall voters will hear my pleas for Lemmy and MOTORHEAD to get their due. Black Sabbath finally got in, and I'm certain that bands like Iron Maiden and Judas Priest who were at the forefront of true Heavy Metal (not the Pussy hair band shit of the late '80's early '90's yes, Poison you always sucked ass) might get a nod. After all Metallica is slated on the ballot next year, and if those guys get in then their influences should too.

Plus Lemmy's been quoted as saying he'd want be the guy who moves in next door to you and make your lawn die.

Baba Booey's Wild Ride

The Howard Stern show redux as muppets. My favorite: the silent Beetlejuice who hangs in the studio.

Fatherhood 2000

I always thought Bill Cosby's stand up on his kids was f'ing LAME. Louis CK's edgier take I dig mucho.






PS - Dane Cook sucks ass. Big Time.

Velvet Jones and Oscar ?

Congratulations to Eddie Murphy, my personal favorite comedian for landing a Golden Globe and an Oscar Nomination for Dreamgirls, (which I haven't seen yet).

It's been a long time coming in a career of high's (48 Hours) and lows (Pluto Nash) but for Mr.Robinson, aka Axel Foley, aka Gumby, DAMMIT! playing a James Brown/ Marvin Gaye hybrid is the performance of his lifetime.

To Eddie Murphy, the F-YOU man! Heeeeh, heeeh, heeeh!

Gino's Back to Party!

It's Friday folks and Gino's stylin' and profilin' to go hit the clubs! Check out his shoes! Will Martin Scorsese please stick this kid in a movie already!

I love this lil'dude.

Wetback English

These are the type of Infomercials I'd like to see. For my Border Buddy's friend in during his first military tour of duty, CRUZ.

Gene, Gene, The Dancin' Machine

I love this guy. I remember watching THE GONG SHOW as a kid and being floored by the wackiness that ensued during that 1/2 hour show hosted by none other than Chuck Barris.

I don't usually get starstruck but when I was a Page at NBC I hung out with Gene Gene the Dancing machine who was working the Tonight Show and he told me stories of the Gong Show. Man I was in heaven. What a cool guy. I even did my impersonation of him of when I was kid dancing like him. He laughed, and probably thought I was retarded. But what I loved most of all was that he was the anti-cool, and people loved it.

Unfortunately diabetes caused Gene to have both legs amputated from the knees down but that'll never stop the pure joy of watching a big dude dance his ass off without a care in the world.



P.S. F-Danny Terrio, and Dance Fever. Gino the Ginny's got your number.

Mom, What's for Breakfast?

Gino The Ginny's favorite Cereal...

JOE LAMPONE III

Since Joe E Rocco's not blogging lately, I'd fill in his absence with found future footage of his son, JOE ROCCO III. I love Joe like a Bro, but I love his kid even more.

How Not To Get Your Ass Kicked by the PD